So how I look at the role and culture of the housewife shan’t be tainted by the left-wing, Housewife-lovin‘, women’s-lib magazines like Women’s Health, Woman’s Day, Living, or O. No, sir. If I want to know what a Housewife does, I think TV does just about as good a job as anything in our society at teaching and informing.
Happy National Housewives Day – Great TV Housewives
So, I salute you, Housewives. And I do so by honoring 5 of the greatest Housewives this nation has ever known.
“Performed conscientiously, the housewife’s work is at least full-time, and one of the most honorable of professions. At her best, the full-time housewife is the anchor of a healthy family; and we all know that the healthy family is the anchor of a free society.”
June Cleaver (played by Barbara Billingsly) – Leave it to BeaverThe original television stay-at-home Mom, June raised Wally and The Beaver and, in her dresses and skirts, she is what Norman Rockwell himself would’ve painted depicting a ’50s era housewife. Ward Cleaver never had to lift a finger, unless he was reading the news paper, working in the garage, or having some father-son moments with Wally and the ‘Beave. Leave it to Beaver is like an instruction manual for the idealized suburban Americana we all aspire to. Birds whistling in the trees, kids tapping sticks against spotless white picket fences, and the worst things a kid had to deal with was whether or not it was a wise decision to have given his letterman’s sweater to a girl at school. What a simple time it was (even if it wasn’t). I raise a white wine spritzer to you, June.
A former dancer in the U.S.O., Laura Petrie raised eye brows everywhere when her housewife character wore – gasp – capri slacks instead of neatly pressed dresses. I’ll bet ya two nickels June Cleaver wouldn’t have allowed Laura Petrie into the Bridge Club. Where June Cleaver was oft to give a disapproving look or two at Ward when he was being unreasonable, Laura Petrie was beloved because she portrayed a more realistic approach to housewiving (I know, “housewiving” is not a word). She was openly mad at times. She cried. She was, in many ways, an equal partner to her television comedy writer husband, Rob Petrie (Dick Van Dyke). They slept in separate bed’s, still, but she paved the way for a more independent TV-mother of the future. It’s too bad the feminist movement wasn’t all about women being recognized for their outstanding Vaudevillian abilities which is what I loved most about Laura Petrie – how gifted she was at song and dance. I think it would be awesome if my wife and I performed song and dance numbers for my boss and co-workers in our living room. Oh, well …I guess some parts of TV are totally fake.
The early ’60s gave us a housewife in pants. The late ’60s and early ’70s sit-com housewife wore short skirts, had a maid-slash-wise-cracking-housekeeper, and even slept in the same bed with her (second) husband. Vapors! I nearly fainted simply writing that last sentence. If June Cleaver was the idealized 1950s housewife, then Carol Brady was her 1970s equivalent. In fact, Carol Brady just might be a housewife for the ages. 6 kids, yet she was never required to cook or clean. Hmm, maybe I shouldn’t be including her on a list celebrating housewives, because that kinda makes real housewives bitter. Ah, heck – she was awesome, anyway. And pretty. And I think Florence Henderson really slept around Hollywood. Which is awesome. Not that I was a part of 1960s and ’70s era Hollywood, so I don’t know why I’m high-fiving my picture of Frank Sinatra right now. Oh, yes. I guess she gets most credit for raising six kids (only 3 of which were hers) and keeping them all on the straight and narrow, choreographing their variety show song & dance numbers, and then still managing to get them all together for Christmas specials well into the 1980s. The lesson Carol Brady teaches us is clear – marry a wealthy architect and work on your wise-cracking one-liners, and you can have one heckuvva nice life as a housewife.
I really wanted to find an 80s era sit-com housewife, but that proved tougher than you’d think. It seems, in the ’80s, it was really cool to minimize the fact some women actually were housewives. Maggy Seaver (Growing Pains), Elise Keaton (Family Ties), Angela Bower (Who’s the Boss?), and Claire Huxtable (The Cosby Show), all the ladies were working full-time and still managing their homes – I mean except if they could hire Tony Danza – ay-oh, oh-ay! And because I didn’t want to celebrate Peggy Bundy (Married with Children), I had to go with a Mrs. C, even though her ’80s era television motherhood didn’t include much Richie and all happened after the show “jumped the shark” (literally, in this case). Marion Cunningham was on on an ’80s show playing a 1950s mother. She should’ve been more like June Cleaver, right? Well, revisionist history is the best history, I always say. Kudos to ABC for boldly re-writing it. And kudos to Happy Days for reminding us that being a housewife is a barrel of laughs if your son has some funny, quirky friends.
Note: The role of friends and neighbors in adding quality to the life of a housewife should never be underestimated. For every quirky co-worker a man has, I think the wacky neighbor trumps it every time.
She’s the housewife we celebrate to honor all those housewives who don’t really enjoy their role all that much. In Mad Men‘s Betty Draper, we have a woman who hates the role of housewife, actually, and she’s set in a time (1963) when nearly every woman was a housewife. She sort of symbolizes the bra-burning, women’s lib movement that ignites the nation later on in the ’60s. Or at least that’s what I summarized from Peter Jenning’s The Century documentary and a few select television mini-series that played near the end of the ’90s. Betty Draper even hates her own kids and the prison that is the world of the housewife. She drinks all day, has a few extramarital flings, and has a housekeeper. Totally unrealistic, now that I think about it. And the only reason she’s on this list is because nobody is Googling “Carol Brady” today – but I just might get some accidental readers who were searching “January”, “Jones” and “nude.” Hi, pervs. All are welcome in this place. Nude pictures of January Jones are here. Haha. Just kidding.
No, actually, we love Betty Draper and I’ll bet all housewives, if you catch them on the right day, can totally relate to her loathing of the role. To you housewives, I raise a martini and inappropriately touch you on the butt (that was totally ‘ok‘ in the early ’60s).
So what have we learned? All the best examples of quality housewives happened 20 years ago or more. Nobody writes good roles for housewives any more – and I thought about that for like 30 whole seconds, so don’t start filling the comments section with all the shows and characters I missed. Well, actually, do that. So next year I’ll have a better article.
Fact – Miley Cyrus-slash-Hannah Montana doesn’t even have a mother on her show. How warped is that?
If you are a housewife, a TV fan, or know a housewife. Send them this article as a love letter and tell them you appreciate all they do, and even that which they don’t do.
Happy Housewive’s Day!
