So we’ve got black-and-white noir action, the return of the Phantom Limb’s original costume, a disturbing variation on Spider-Man, Sgt. Hatred teaming up with Pete White and Billy Quizboy, Brock Samson kicking ass, and a zombie horde of Hanks and Deans. And apparently, Doc Venture’s life is in danger again. Or still, probably. Come on, September 12!
The Good Guys – This week actually brought us the “Summer Finale”. While we were briefly depressed about this, we’re only about a month and a half away from the “Fall Premiere”. We can hold on for that long at least.
We failed to mention this series last week, and that was the episode that gave us Dan Stark’s lime
green manny-panties. That was our bad, and we apologize. But this week’s episode was just as great, with Dan becoming a YouTube sensation by tazing a guy in the Witness Protection Program and then his own partner. (And following the running joke where Dan doesn’t know the name of anything invented after 1985, he called the tazer a “Robot Gun” throughout the entire episode.)
As tends to happen, things spiraled out of control with a Mafia hitman, the world’s most incompetent bookie, a hot FBI agent, and somebody breaking into Dan’s beloved trailer. It was ridiculously fun and capped off a great summer run.
And we’ve mostly focused on Dan Stark, which is mostly because he’s awesome. But Colin Hanks’ Jack Bailey should not be overlooked. He helps ground the show and keep it from going too far over the top, but he’s really funny in his own right. And his relationship with ex-girlfriend (and Assistant District Attorney) Liz is adorable and frustrating. We can’t wait for the show to come back in September.
MasterChef – Because if there’s one thing Gordon Ramsay needs, it’s another television show. This new series is a competition for amateur chefs, as opposed to Top Chef or Hell’s Kitchen, which are for people with restaurant experience. It’s the American Idol of food shows, right down to the three-judge format and the early audition episodes.
It takes two “yes” votes to advance, and this week, one young woman received only one “yes”, from Gordon Ramsay. She left the room to cry, and after she left, Gordon went all 12 Angry Men on the other judges, trying to coax another vote. He actually got out of his chair and paced back and forth like an old-timey lawyer (or a simple country hyper-chicken). He made judge Graham Elliot try the dish again. He talked about the flavors, and when Graham started to waver, Gordon told him “If you have any balls, you’ll go out there and give her an apron”. That’s right, Gordon Ramsay browbeat another judge into liking something and then apologizing for not liking it earlier. It was truly inspiring.
It should also be noted that this week’s episode included a contestant who carved apples into replicas of the three judges, and a woman who made a dish that looked like what Gordon called “a tadpole” but what everybody watching at home called “a giant sperm”.
Rubicon – Honestly, we’re not really qualified to talk about this new AMC series just yet. This twisty conspiracy drama officially premiered this week, after a sneak preview airing following the Breaking Bad season finale. See, we watched it and yes, it’s really good. AMC is good at making shows that we want to watch. However, by the beginning of the second episode, it was clear that we hadn’t paid nearly enough attention. This is going to be the kind of show that we watch without distractions and with a notepad handy. So at this point, we’re ready to say that we really like it, and once we focus a little more, we just might love it. Either way, you should definitely start watching it now so you’re not lost when we start talking at length about it.
Louie – This week was another hilarious episode, but what really brought us joy this week was the news that Louie has been renewed for a second season! We’ve said it before, and we’ll say it again – FX has the best line-up of anybody in the business. Louie, Justified, Archer, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Rescue Me, Sons of Anarchy, The League – if it’s on FX, you should watch it. (And we are intrigued by those strange ads for the upcoming Terriers. Is it possible that it’s really a series about a small dog?)
Wipeout – Not only did this episode bring back our favorite obstacle (in which the contestant picks one of three doors, and then no matter what door they pick, they get hit by a hammer), but we also met two of our favorite contestants of all time.
Frank, who John Henson nicknamed “Freak of Nature”, was scrawny and intense and had a crazy look in his eyes. He attacked every event with this crazy focus, powering through everything they threw at him. In the Wipeout Zone, he didn’t even seem like a man who was running an obstacle course – for the most part, the big balls and sweeper arms didn’t even seem to phase him. The next day, everybody at work was talking about “the crazy guy on Wipeout”.
And then there was Yana Zhernova, our favorite contestant ever. An adorable young Russian woman, this was how Yana explained her motives for competing: “I’m really, really happy to be in the United States. When I win and take your money, I’m gonna have a beautiful American baby. She’s gonna look like me, of course it’s gonna be beautiful. I already have a nice, really nice sperm donor, and I think my country will be proud of me.”
And then Jill Wagner asked her where she comes from. “I was born in USSR as a communist.” HA! Sadly, she didn’t make it past the second round, but man, we want to see her get her own show.
See? That’s a pretty joyous week! And now, we have an awesome discussion question from EJ’s sister, Jane. Jane asks: “What made people think show crossovers were a good idea? Could we bring them back and have them be less cheesy? Or are crossovers per se cheesy?”
