ASAP arrives for their performance, and Star Jones is redefining the term “hot mess”. There’s a sleeveless olive top and her hair looks like a drag queen version of Helena Bonham Carter. Apparently she’s actually in character, but I really dislike her, so I’m going to take any chance to make fun of her. Lisa tries to get the team pumped, but I don’t think, say, Vince Lombardi ever ended a locker room speech with the words “let’s not let any pettiness get in the way out there”. Star just straight up makes fun of her and interviews that this is all “for the kids”, which is pretty weird for a woman who was demanding cover credit 45 seconds ago. Dionne is also nasty. She and Star are total Mean Girls, and they are going to make “fetch” happen.
