Dancing With the Stars – Season 11, Results, Week 5

Shakira is here to perform “Loca” from her new album.  As you’re all aware by now, things like good singing or intelligible lyrics are beside the point.  It’s all about Shakira and her bare torso shaking her hips in sparkly harem pants and a bikini top.  I will be hella pisssed if she ever ends up in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

Jason Derulo, he of the one original song, is here to sing “Georgia On My Mind”.  Dancers I don’t recognize accompany him.  Neither has shoes on, but I want to know how this guy is dancing on the hardwood in dress socks.  They must have some grippers on them, like those awesome slipper socks they give you in the hospital.  Not something I thought I’d ever put in a DWTS recap.  Oh well, nevermind, he does have shoes on.  Forget that whole last thing.  Oh, and I’m happy to report that Jason Derulo does not say his own name during the song, and he sings it nicely.  Now, go away.