Dancing With The Stars

Dancing With the Stars: Week 5 Performances (April 6)

Can I just start this evening’s recap off by saying that when I froze the intros to open a new document and begin the recap, I was struck by all the horrible tiering of the ladies’ gowns this week.  It’s like they’re the biggest whores at Juniper Creek (High five, Big Love fans!) Except for Edyta, who, bless her, is shaming me and all other mortal women,with her ridiculous abs of steel.  And they really need to stop pushing Shawn’s boobs at me.  She’s seventeen, for goodness sake!  (Maybe they felt like they had to give Cheryl’s chest a break after last week. -EJ)Samantha is back in full voice, so our holiday from inane interviews is over.  It was fun while it lasted.  At least we’re down to 90 minutes tonight.
On with the recap, from first to worst…

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