Dancing With the Stars: The Finale! (May 21)
10:29 PM Myn: OMG–the lady in the DWTS band with the stupid head dress thing is from Detroit! She’s going to be on the news tonight!
EJ: Really? Your local news is so much better than mine!
10:30 PM Myn: Well, D-town is better than G-Rap. And our mayor will kick your mayor’s ass!
EJ: Your mayor’s crazy, man! Our mayor’s staying clear of that.
10:31 PM Myn: He and Cheryl Burke apparently have something in common though–crazy texting habits that are out of control. This is just what I hear.
EJ: Oh, yeah. You mentioned Cheryl’s texting. And yet, she’s never once texted me.
10:32 PM Myn: Aw, Kristi really has improved her overall performance during the show. She’s so cute.
OK, this Jive has to get 10’s again…
EJ: I know — it’s weird to see how good she was and then see how good she ended up getting.
10:33 PM This was a good choice — it was the first time she really rocked a “fun” dance.
Myn: Mark’s faces kill me. He looks like a fish, then a beaver.
EJ: Those glasses aren’t helping, either.
Myn: You know, he and Julianne were each other’s first loves…
10:34 PM EJ: Really? They both seem so, I don’t know, puppyish to me.
10:35 PM Myn: And both of them were in a music group with Derek when they were all teens in Europe. I have to look up the name of it.
EJ: You’re making this up!
Myn: Bruno looks like a pimp, doesn’t he?
I swear it’s true!
EJ: I need to know more about this.
10:36 PM Yeah, the white suit makes him look a little seedy. He just needs the hat.
Myn: With a feather.
EJ: And we are not surprised by the 10’s.
EJ: Unless Jason just dominated the voting, he doesn’t have a prayer.
Myn: He shouldn’t. I still think Mario Lopez should have beaten Emmitt Smith. You know, he and I are close. We once met in an airport bar in Dayton, OH. Now who sounds seedy? Oops.
10:38 PM EJ: Hee. I love how any story involving an airport bar makes it sound like your life has taken a wrong turn.
10:39 PM Myn: And really I was just going to NY for Thanksgiving.
OK, from Julianne’s Wikipedia page:
Her parents sent her and her brother to London a year later to spare them the strife of divorce[5] and to live and study with their coaches, the world Latin Dance Champions Corky and Shirley Ballas. The Ballases helped tutor the two Hough children alongside their own son, Mark, while schooling them at the Italia Conti Performing Arts School. They received training in virtually every form of dance, from gymnastics to jazz, and ballet to tap.[6][5] The three children formed their own pop music trio 2B1G (“2 Boys, 1 Girl”) when Julianne was twelve,[7] performed at Dance Competitions in the U.K. and the U.S., and showcased a UK television show.[8]
10:40 PM EJ: Wow! “2B1G”? If they didn’t work out as a music group, they could always recycle the name for a Star Wars character.
Myn: Ha! R2’s long lost son!
EJ: I’m clearly going to have to track down some of their songs. This has the potential to be awesome.
10:41 PM Myn: You go do it. Then you can learn the dance routines!
EJ: I hope they have a Robin Sparkles-style video!
Complete with robot!
10:42 PM Myn: Speaking of Robin, how great was the HIMYM finale last night?
Great, I say.
EJ: Oh, I loved it.
10:43 PM When you have a regular get hit by a bus, you know it’s great.
Myn: Jason likes Edyta as a coach cuz she’s purty. Aw.
10:44 PM Every time Jason talks about enjoying dancing as a football player, I immediately start humming “It’s Alright to Cry” from Free to Be You and Me.
EJ: Nice jump!
Myn: Oh, I like this dance. I am surprised they didn’t do the foxtrot, though.
10:45 PM EJ: He mentioned the foxtrot about a thousand times last night, too.
Myn: Her dress looks like a sofa The Golden Girls had on the lanai, doesn’t it?
EJ: Hee. Let’s get a cheesecake and reminisce.
10:46 PM Myn: Ma!
EJ: Jason cracks me up when he emotes. He makes the dorkiest happy face I’ve ever seen.
Myn: Again, my mind wanders.
10:47 PM EJ: Hee. I’ve got nothing to add to that.
Myn: Aw, Cristian is pumped for his “bro”.
EJ: I kind of hope Jason wins just to see how happy Cristian will be.
Myn: Have you heard? Jason is tough and also elegant? Didn’t know if you caught that.
10:48 PM EJ: Really? You don’t say. You’d think they’d mention that every ten seconds.
Myn: So, that was pointless.
EJ: Hey, all 10’s!
10:49 PM Myn: Well, I guess the point is to make Jason feel good about himself. It just keeps things exactly the way they were.
EJ: It actually just makes the point difference between the two less significant as an overall percentage.
Myn: Kelly Monaco looks annoyed.
Oh, you’re using math? Tricky!
EJ: She has a habit of looking mad for no good reason.
Myn: But, also, insanely hot.
10:50 PM EJ: Preaching to the choir!
Myn: Tom: “What the hell is going on now?” Shannon cried again!
EJ: Hee. I love Tom.
10:51 PM Marlee’s fake crying! Just when I thought I couldn’t like her any better…
Myn: I love how he deftly avoided speaking to either Penn or Adam. The man’s a pro.
10:52 PM EJ: Yeah, the man delivers a show, and he delivers it on time. He’s so good at that.
Myn: OK, I just saw a commercial for Starbucks chocolate. I’m guessing I will need at least a case of that stuff.
For a week.
10:53 PM EJ: Because they haven’t enslaved America’s addictions quite enough yet.
Next year, they’ll have their own tobacco.
Myn: It’s a vicious cycle…
10:54 PM EJ: Wow, Lohan and Naomi Campbell on Ugly Betty. The trainwreck potential is enormous.
Myn: Also, the possible injuries. Quick, hide all the cars and phones!
10:55 PM EJ: Now, I may be crazy, but I think they’re saying Naomi called a cop a “honky”. Does that sound right?
Myn: Yes. That’s right. FINALLY! it’s time for Kristi’s coronation! RIGHT???
EJ: Oh, man. I’m so nervous.
Myn: She was the highest ever scorer, of course.
10:56 PM EJ: I don’t think she ever got lower than an 8…
Myn: YAY! Kristi Wins!
EJ: She deserved that. Good for her!
10:57 PM Myn: I wonder if Mark gets a bonus?
Kristi says “K” is a good initial for a woman to have on DWTS, she’s a cutie.
EJ: She’s so tiny and adorable. She’s like one of the dancing kids.
Myn: I’m impressed they’ve left enough time for everyone to speak.
10:58 PM EJ: I know! They’ve still got three minutes.
More time for Samantha to interview!
Myn: Oh, well, that’s good.
I think the trophy’s nicer now. Or am I just used to it?
10:59 PM Hey–look it’s 2B1G!
Maybe they can open for NKOTB!
EJ: No, I think they cleaned it up a little. They showed one of Cheryl’s trophies last night, and it still looked crummy.
I can’t wait for the 2B1G reunion show!
Myn: I feel like the first one was made out of tin foil. Like they didn’t want to invest much, in case the show tanked.
11:00 PM EJ: Remember how the first season had six dancers and two were ABC employees?
Myn: Ah, yes.
EJ: And then somebody was eliminated at the end of the show, which meant they still had to rehearse for a week for no good reason.
11:01 PM Myn: The voting process was not streamlined like it is now. Clearly, they were thinking it was not going to do much.
11:02 PM EJ: ABC was as surprised as anybody that people actually watched it.
And, now we’ve watched the entire sixth season, including two hours of filler tonight. We are gluttons for punishment, aren’t we? Thanks for sticking with us. We’ll see you back here next fall!
