Trina and Tom are having bloody marys with that dude Bud who got busy in the basement back in the pilot. He’s now part-owner of a disco that he wants the Deckers to invest in. Hmmm, a disco in Chicago. I can’t imagine anything negative that might be associated with that in a few short years, can you?
Roger secretly meets with the shrink from last week admits that he thinks he’s in love with Susan, and proceeds to extol her many virtues. He says he still loves Janet and knows this isn’t fair to her, but they determine that he really needs to let Susan in on these feelings. Wouldn’t you know, there’s only one grocery store in Chicago, and they’re both there at the same time! Roger is attempting to make Chicken Kiev, and Susan’s got nothing but time to help him out. They have a genuinely fun time getting the chicken ready to bake, and it’s the most sexually charged scene including raw poultry that I can recall in quite a while. Just when Roger is about to spill his guts, Janet comes home from a stressful first day in the trenches and is touched by Susan helping Roger cook, not noticing the tension in the room.
Maybe she was still distracted by the hectic nature of the newsroom in which she spent the day, surrounded by typewriters and dodging ass-grabbing bosses. But it’s Janet, so is there any doubt she’ll be runnin’ the place one day? In the meantime, she’s sitting down to burnt chicken with Roger and Rick, the latter of whom announces his double date with BJ. Janet is shocked to find out there will be actual girls involved. After a fight about the food, and her frustration with his unemployment in general, Janet send Roger to watch Hawaii 5-0 as she makes something edible for them. She later tells him that all she needs to be really happy is for him to find a good job that makes him happy and things will be “exactly the way they used to be”. Roger is non-plussed to say the least. Remember back when he told her he needed more? Janet seems to have already forgotten.
If you must know about the children, I can tell you that Rick and BJ played strip poker with Samantha and her hot cousin Lisa, who momentarily quelled the idea of Rick being gay, as he seemed to pop a boner the minute he saw her in BJ’s window. However, when she kisses him after he loses yet another hand (and is about to lose his tighty whities) and takes him inside to make out, it’s a hot minute before he’s high-tailing it outta there, pulling his jeans on and running away fast. What happened? Exactly nothing, according to hot Lisa. BJ and Sam, on the other hand, share a sweet kiss after he tells her she doesn’t have to pop her top when she loses a hand. They’re cute, but the story line is dull.
And Lori is still sexin’ up Doug, but pretending that he’s giving her driving lessons. Her parents are still strangely OK with their 17 year old daughter dating a 24 year old teacher, especially since they seem to know all about how much time she spends visiting him in the city. Seriously, when Trina’s raising an eyebrow at your parenting, you may have crossed a line. Bruce eventually takes her for an actual driving lesson and their mutual stubborn streaks give way to a father daughter heart to heart about how awesome, smart and beautiful he thinks she is. Too bad these are the two least sympathetic characters on the show.
Back to the grown ups, who just like to act like crazy teenagers sometimes. Tom & Trina have talked Bruce and Susan into accompanying them to the disco (Trina really had to twist Susan’s arm! And there was a really cute scene involving dance lessons!) and once they are confirmed to be “on the list” the freaky foursome proceeds to party. First, Trina and Susan do the time-honored “hot chicks dancing with each other to pick up skeevy guys” thing while their hubbies look on with pride. Bruce picks out the gay guys in the club, which is the most obvious and awesome aping of Studio 54 this side of that legendary club’s Behind the Music episode. I half expect a Very Special Guest Star in the form of Mike Myers as Steve Rubell to show up in the DJ booth.
It must be noted here that Grant Show is wearing an awesome white leisure suite complete with vest and black silk shirt unbuttoned down to there, ala Travolta in Saturday Night Fever. And he totally pulls it off! Something else he continues to pull off? The ‘stache, who I found out from this article he had nicknamed Sebastian.
The couples reconvene in a booth and quaaludes are passed around, so you know what Susan’s thinking. After a gorgeous display of all four principles doing The Hustle and switching partners for some dancing and kissing, Susan remarks on how hot the club is, so Trina suggest hitting their pool for a dip. At the Cougar Den, a dip generally doesn’t involve bathing suits. What it does involve is partner swapping and copious amounts of intertwined limbs. The best (or worst) part of the show has to be the awkward goodbye at the door (Susan keeps trying to do a leave behind with her earrings…for Tom or Trina?) and this exchange when Bruce and Susan get outside:
Bruce: That was fun, right?
Susan: (dejectedly, not making eye contact) Yeah.
Bruce: Let’s go home.
So much for enjoying each other, huh Bruce?
The next day, while Bruce is off driving with Lori, Susan is alone at home. Roger walks in and asks if anyone’s there. When she says no and walks towards him slowly and with quite the come hither look, Roger wastes no time kissing the hell out of her. She kisses right back, and the show closes with them staring at each other while Carole King’s slow version of “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?” plays on the soundtrack. We have to wait two weeks to see the season finale, but I have a feeling it’ll be worth it. Remember, send those Save Our Show Letters to CBS and stick some fake mustaches in there! Tell ’em spunkybean sent ya!
