Ultimately, Lori runs away from the cabin to hitch her way to the concert (and Doug) and has the good fortune to get picked up by a crusty old broad rather than a knife wielding psychopath. Bold choice, writers! She offers sage wisdom such as the old chestnut, “Men are like lightbulbs. Keep screwing until one of them works.” I hear ya, sister. Lori only makes it as far as diner in a town called Honey Creek, and, after some phone calls on both ends, is found by both her parents and her boyfriend. And you know what will make it all better? That’s right, pie. Makes mine Boston Cream, would you? When all is said and done, Bruce relents after grilling Doug a bit (“You don’t know anybody your own age?”) and seeing Susan’s points about how Doug’s helped Lori get involved in the community and she still has good grades. Somehow, I can’t imagine this happening today, can you? Bruce pulls the classic dad move and gives Lori money before she and Doug drive off together.
For her part, Susan is missing Roger, as her fondest memories of the cabin now include their private stone skipping session. She calls him, ostensibly to check in on Rick’s behalf, but they giggle about the last time they were at the cabin. Janet kills any buzz by grabbing the phone, which brings Susan back to reality. Later, she misses a picnic with Bruce because she gets carried away with Roger again (“it’s not as fun as last time.”), then has to cover when he bursts in while she’s still on the phone. The Love Square is getting pretty awkward, huh?
Roger is busy with a shrink, at Janet’s behest. She’s reading a self help book called Wake Up and Be You which she calls a “life program workbook”. Isn’t everything kind of a workbook for Janet? She also does not understand how therapy works, as she assumes the psychiatrist will just “fix” Roger lickety split. (do I detect a little theme, perhaps?) When the questions turn first to her, then to the situation with Susan, Janet walks out in a huff. She returns the next day to advise the doctor they won’t be paying, which I assume she could have done over the phone, so clearly she wanted to talk some more. We learn that Janet has not endeavored to find a secretarial job since Roger is “the man. He’s supposed to provide.” Oh boy. She then delves into the issue of one Tom Decker, whose attentions are making her a bit uncomfortable…since she sort of likes them. She’s been keeping a mental checklist: he asked her to dance, he “arranged” to have her as a partner for the scavenger hunt and, of course, last week’s kiss. She waxes poetic about Tom’s mustache and his cool job, then says she feels bad, because he “can’t have me.” Awesome.
And, Tom’s busy anyway, since he and Trina have hit the the costume closet and the toy chest in the hopes of forgetting the fun they’re missing in the “playroom”. I’m guessing Trina’s French maid uniform worked for everyone? I certainly enjoyed Tom answering the phone in his bikini briefs. He turns down a “private party” with two horny folks names Anthony & Michelle.
Emboldened by the psychiatrist, Janet marches over to the Deckers to explain her feelings to Tom. I’m sure the sight of him fresh from the pool really helped her resolve. And, just when she’s about to tell him he’s been inappropriate, Trina comes in, so she panics and invites them to dinner. I guess closing up your marriage creates a good deal of free time, so neither has to check a date book to know that they’re free that night.
This all leads to the best set of scenes from the episode. First, we get to see Janet’s hideous wall sculpture made from metal flowers (courtesy of her parents–wouldn’t you just love to meet those two?), Roger’s attempt at making martinis, and Janet’s cheeseball–well the store bought cheese she formed into a ball and then added nuts to, which impresses Tom, “I like the nuts. It’s a nice touch.” Janet then asks him to come help her baste something, which is her chance to blurt out, “The attention you’ve been showing me makes me uncomfortable.” The mustache is actually surprised, but does it’s job of helping to contain the smile playing at the corners of Tom’s mouth as he works to pull it together. While Tom stammers, Janet goes on to admit she likes him, but “can’t”, and by then he’s composed enough to give Janet a heartfelt, “You’re brave.” I think the last thing Tom wants, really, is to coax high maintenance Janet into swinging, but I do think he’s smitten with her in a strange way.
Meanwhile, Trina and Roger sit awkwardly in the living room, until Roger asks if it’s really that easy to get involved with other people without feelings coming into it. Trina’s picks up what he’s laying down and says she knows Janet’s really trying, but it doesn’t matter what she does if Susan’s the woman you really want. She encourages Roger to do one of two things: either tell Susan how he feels and accept the consequences (“and there will be consequences.”) or get over her.
Dinner ends before dessert, and when Roger runs into the kitchen to tell Janet to cease and desist on the coffee making, Tom asks, Trina, “How can dinner be freaky and boring at the same time?” The couple wonders, “Is this what it’s like to be normal?” and scurries off to see if Anthony and Michelle (the show’s very first black couple, by the way) are available for that private party at the last minute. Well, that didn’t last long, did it? Even with costumes and toys. Yet these two seem the most in love of all. By comparison, Janet wraps the hour by telling Roger she’s signing up with an employment agency to help out. As soon as she leaves to take a bath, he turns to dial the cabin. We see him miss Susan by seconds, of course. He instead fishes the shrink’s card out the garbage. Susan has a hum dinger of an evening herself, sitting quietly at the cabin with Bruce, as they read in separate chairs and both look perturbed. So, that’s going well.
