Next, we see a series of too-quick cuts as everyone is awarded their keys. Alex makes sure we know his Dad died on 9/11. Sheila makes sure we know she was in Penthouse. Natalie, leaning out the drive-thru of her coffee place, tells us she “loves bikinis, coffee, and God.” Well, who doesn’t, Natalie? Jacob makes it abundantly clear that he’s a Christian. Chelsia introduces herself (yes, she pronounces it “Chel-see-ah”) and follows her name with the vomit-inducing “but you can call me trouble.” Thanks, I’ll pass. You have a cute haircut, though.
Parker, the TMZ videographer, pops in and out. Amanda proclaims herself high-maintenance (never a good sign). She also gives a horrible line reading. Jen is a bartender from Columbus, so she has some instant cred with me (sorry, EJ!). James is there on the bike he’s apparently ridden halfway around the world, but just happened to have in L.A. at the right time. Neil, Joshuah, Ryan, Sharon, Allison, Matt (lifting weights) and Adam (bowling) all show up in quick succession.
